I am a very lucky woman and have three families. I have my regular family who are so amazing, supportive and wonderful. I have my work family who I have made the most awesome friends from. They check on me, take care of me, and make sure I have what I need. I also have my church family who have supported me, loved me and taken care of me and my kids. All three of my families mean the world to me and it is very hard to have it change. But, change is inevitable and necessary. There just seems to be a lot of it going around lately.
If there is anyone that doesn't know this by now, I am LDS. After Tom died I became angry and I stopped going to church. I used the excuse of I had to work on Sundays. I still believed in God and I knew what was right, but I didn't follow it. I was lonely and angry and took a path that I shouldn't have taken.
In the LDS church, the members are broken down into groups depending on where you live. There are regions, stakes and wards. The regions are divided into stakes and the stakes are divided into wards. I moved to the house I'm in over 7 years ago. I never told anyone in the new ward that I was there, but my membership records follow me where ever I go so they found me. It took a little over a year when they got a new bishop. As soon as he was called to be bishop I had a visit one day. The women of the church have what is called visiting teachers. We are paired up and given 2 to 3 women that we are in charge of making sure they have things that they need. It is a way for us to make friends and provide service. My visiting teachers were the new bishop's wife and her companion. I instantly hit off with them and we became fast friends. Even when they weren't my visiting teachers anymore, they were still my good friends and still are! They were never pushy as far as church goes, they were just my friends and I loved them for it.
The LDS church also has home teachers. Home teachers are similar to visiting teachers. The ward pairs up the men in the ward and assigns them 2-3 families that they are in charge of making sure needs are met, give us spiritual guidance,provide service, and being a friend. My home teacher is the bishop of the ward. He has had many different companions, all of them young men and there were a few months where we had different home teachers, but then the bishop became our home teacher again. The majority of the last 6 years, the bishop has been our home teacher. He is not only my spiritual leader, but he is my dear friend along with his wife.
Over the years I have made many friendships in this ward. Some I would consider to be very close friendships. It is because of these friendships I slowly worked my way back to church. That has not been easy for me, but really, repentance isn't easy. I made some choices over the years that I'm not proud of, but thankfully we have a forgiving God who loves us and we have the atonement. My kids have had some amazing leaders whom my kids absolutely love and they have made some good friends.
Just as I'm getting back to going to church regularly, I start having to work on Sundays again. That was very upsetting for me. I recently had been given a calling to teach in the Relief Society (which is the women's program in the church). It is a once a month thing. I had to work magic with my work schedule and work it out with the other teachers to switch whatever Sunday I'm able to get off so that I can teach. Back in December I had asked for March 23rd off and was denied due to man power. Last week my supervisor said we actually have the coverage now and since I had asked a long time ago, did I still want the day off. I am never going to turn down a day off, especially a Sunday.
I knew there were changes coming, I just didn't know just how much those changes were going to effect me and my kids. Yesterday our bishop was released. He is no longer our bishop. I knew it was coming, it has been almost 6 years since he was put into that calling. It was time. I was sad though. He has been such a great spiritual leader, he had a big part in me coming back to church and he is a wonderful friend. Of course the friendship will always be there.
Then we had another blow. I was pretty sure they were going to redraw the ward boundaries, but I had no idea that we were going to be part of the change. Never saw it coming! The few streets where I live were annexed into another ward. What?! I was stunned. My kids lost their great leaders, we just lost our home teacher, I lost my visiting teaching companion and the lady that we visit, which is my dear friend the bishop's wife, my kids lost some of their friends, and I lost the new calling I was growing to love. Now of course we still live in the same neighborhood and we go to church in the same building, just a different time, and those friendships are there to stay. However, it is wonderful to go to church and other church activities and see your friends. Especially my kids because they have activities every week. It is a huge change for them. I am sure the new ward is wonderful and we will all have no problem making new friends. I am grateful for those friends that get to join us in the new ward. None of us will be alone in this transition because we will have each other. My kids said they feel like they are moving away, but without actually moving. I think this is harder because we are still neighbors, but not in the same ward!
Obviously the Lord thinks we need to make this change and be in a new ward. He had to do it for me because he knew that I would not do it on my own. I love where we live and so do my kids. We need to grow and make new friends, but I feel like a big part of me is being left behind. Change is necessary in order for us to grow and growing is not always easy or comfortable. So, time to make the big leap and see what the Lord has in store for us.
Monday, March 24, 2014
Monday, January 20, 2014
ADHD
I have some friends who have a son that struggles with hyperactivity like my son. They have always told me they control his angry outbursts with diet. No artificial coloring, flavoring or sweetening and no sugar, high fructose corn syrup or any other 'oses in their food. So in other words, whole foods. I was a bit doubtful of this for quite a while.
Several years ago I took my son to a pediatrician about his hyperactivity and inability to concentrate. The doctor spent 1 minute with him and diagnosed him with ADHD. The angry outbursts and arguing are all part of it as well. So immediately he was put on medication for it. I noticed he would calm down significantly for sure and he stopped getting into trouble at school, but his grades are not improving. I was also told that diet has nothing to do with it and that was a myth. He was a doctor and I believed him. I believed him when he told me medication was the only answer. I believed him when he said I have to take him to a Psychiatrist to get him to stop arguing. I believed the Psychiatrist when she told me she needed to up his medication and add another one after only spending 10 minutes with him.
It has been almost a year since I made the big decision to change the way I eat. I started out by cutting out sugar. Then I was told that wheat was just as bad and I was given the book "Wheat Belly" to read. That book scared the crap out of me and I made some DRASTIC changes to my diet. I went whole foods and organic when I can. I am still working on the dairy thing, but that will come in time I guess. I don't anything processed or artificial. I am learning more each day about how to eat properly. I also am sugar, gluten and mostly grain free. I will give in once in a while and I always regret it. My body rejects all of that stuff now. I have lost 35 pounds and I feel so much better. I am not perfect at it by any means, but I am getting better each day.
I never made my kids go to this new way of eating really, except at dinner time with the main meal. I still allowed them to eat bread, cereal and some sugar and I think it was mostly for convenience. I was overwhelmed with what I should feed myself let alone trying to figure out what to feed them for breakfast, lunch and snacks. Not to mention they go to a church activity or a friend's house and they are pumped full of sugary treats. Before Christmas last year I needed to make an appointment with the Psychiatrist for my son. I kept forgetting to do it. Then I found out she was going strictly cash and would no longer take insurance. That meant I was back to the drawing board trying to find a Psychiatrist who took insurance...*sigh*. We were getting close to running out of his medication and I was going to try the pediatrician again. Again, I kept forgetting to make the appointment. I had just enough pills to get him through school before Christmas break. Coincidence? I think not. I had a chat with him and he wanted to be off the meds. We made a decision together that as a family we would all go to the new way of eating. I took both of my kids off sugar, gluten, processed food, artificial everything and cut back on dairy. They eat a lot more meat, eggs, veggies and fruits and I try to buy organic when I can. I had 2 weeks to get him on some form of an eating schedule before school started.
It hasn't been easy for sure. I feel like I'm being sabotaged every corner I turn. The kids are bombarded with sugar at school, church and friends. However, we are wading through and I have noticed a significant improvement. My son still loves to argue, but most times I can handle it. I know IMMEDIATELY when he has had sugar. Here's an example of what happens when he has sugar. He talks 100 mph and he argues a lot more. One day I let him have a tiny bit of ice cream. When we went to Walmart he literally ran through the store. He didn't walk at all, it was running. He also was incapable of listening to me. He has only had 9th hour (detention) 1 time since he started back to school. Before it was several times a week. I'm not saying he's not hyper, because he definitely is. He is however starting to finally grasp the consequence thing. His sense of humor is also showing up. I really think the medication was numbing him. I am not a medical doctor or an expert. I am not saying going off medication is really the right thing to do. I'm still wading through it and trying to figure it out. But, I can say this. Doctors will never ever again be able to convince me that diet doesn't effect behavior. I have seen too many times over the last month something to the contrary. It may become something that I have to do in conjunction with medication, but I am going to make absolutely sure before I put him back on medication.
Several years ago I took my son to a pediatrician about his hyperactivity and inability to concentrate. The doctor spent 1 minute with him and diagnosed him with ADHD. The angry outbursts and arguing are all part of it as well. So immediately he was put on medication for it. I noticed he would calm down significantly for sure and he stopped getting into trouble at school, but his grades are not improving. I was also told that diet has nothing to do with it and that was a myth. He was a doctor and I believed him. I believed him when he told me medication was the only answer. I believed him when he said I have to take him to a Psychiatrist to get him to stop arguing. I believed the Psychiatrist when she told me she needed to up his medication and add another one after only spending 10 minutes with him.
It has been almost a year since I made the big decision to change the way I eat. I started out by cutting out sugar. Then I was told that wheat was just as bad and I was given the book "Wheat Belly" to read. That book scared the crap out of me and I made some DRASTIC changes to my diet. I went whole foods and organic when I can. I am still working on the dairy thing, but that will come in time I guess. I don't anything processed or artificial. I am learning more each day about how to eat properly. I also am sugar, gluten and mostly grain free. I will give in once in a while and I always regret it. My body rejects all of that stuff now. I have lost 35 pounds and I feel so much better. I am not perfect at it by any means, but I am getting better each day.
I never made my kids go to this new way of eating really, except at dinner time with the main meal. I still allowed them to eat bread, cereal and some sugar and I think it was mostly for convenience. I was overwhelmed with what I should feed myself let alone trying to figure out what to feed them for breakfast, lunch and snacks. Not to mention they go to a church activity or a friend's house and they are pumped full of sugary treats. Before Christmas last year I needed to make an appointment with the Psychiatrist for my son. I kept forgetting to do it. Then I found out she was going strictly cash and would no longer take insurance. That meant I was back to the drawing board trying to find a Psychiatrist who took insurance...*sigh*. We were getting close to running out of his medication and I was going to try the pediatrician again. Again, I kept forgetting to make the appointment. I had just enough pills to get him through school before Christmas break. Coincidence? I think not. I had a chat with him and he wanted to be off the meds. We made a decision together that as a family we would all go to the new way of eating. I took both of my kids off sugar, gluten, processed food, artificial everything and cut back on dairy. They eat a lot more meat, eggs, veggies and fruits and I try to buy organic when I can. I had 2 weeks to get him on some form of an eating schedule before school started.
It hasn't been easy for sure. I feel like I'm being sabotaged every corner I turn. The kids are bombarded with sugar at school, church and friends. However, we are wading through and I have noticed a significant improvement. My son still loves to argue, but most times I can handle it. I know IMMEDIATELY when he has had sugar. Here's an example of what happens when he has sugar. He talks 100 mph and he argues a lot more. One day I let him have a tiny bit of ice cream. When we went to Walmart he literally ran through the store. He didn't walk at all, it was running. He also was incapable of listening to me. He has only had 9th hour (detention) 1 time since he started back to school. Before it was several times a week. I'm not saying he's not hyper, because he definitely is. He is however starting to finally grasp the consequence thing. His sense of humor is also showing up. I really think the medication was numbing him. I am not a medical doctor or an expert. I am not saying going off medication is really the right thing to do. I'm still wading through it and trying to figure it out. But, I can say this. Doctors will never ever again be able to convince me that diet doesn't effect behavior. I have seen too many times over the last month something to the contrary. It may become something that I have to do in conjunction with medication, but I am going to make absolutely sure before I put him back on medication.
Friday, December 27, 2013
Yay...Christmas is Over!
I know I sound like a Grinch or Scrooge, but I am so glad Christmas is over. It hasn't been the best of Christmas'. Don't get me wrong, we were blessed beyond belief by secret santas again this year. There are so many generous people out there and it restores faith in humanity. I am forever grateful to those that are so giving and someday I hope to be in a position to give to someone.
This year, as in almost every year, I had to work. Kind of takes the fun out of Christmas. I love my job and I love the people I work with, but I would much rather be at home for sure. I also started feeling pretty crappy on Christmas day. I was struggling with my voice and I have been coughing for days. Considering all I do at work is talk, it makes it difficult to do my job. Then after work, my mom, my kids and I did the present thing. My kids ripped thru their gifts in about 3 minutes flat. My mom has had some kind of stomach bug for a few days so she wasn't feeling well and I was starting to get a fever with whatever bug I had. Yippee...super exciting Christmas.
I ended up in bed all day yesterday. I don't think I have slept so much as I did yesterday. Weird how fever does that to you. I drank and drank and it just didn't seem like enough. I didn't eat much either. I stayed home again today and when I woke up I was actually starving and my voice is somewhat back. I don't have a fever at the moment so that is a good thing. I am really hoping to be over this soon. I have a hard time being down in bed unless it is by my choice. Trust me, since my husband died, there have been many a day where I have done nothing but lay in bed, but that was my choice.
I did accomplish one thing yesterday. I paid for my school. I can't believe it is almost time to start school. I never thought it would get here, but at the same time it came so fast. Am I ready? I sure hope so.
I also watched a movie I got for Christmas yesterday. Bridges of Madison County. I just love that movie. I love the music and I love the tragic love story. I cried and cried over that movie. I have a friend that doesn't like it because she thinks they could have chosen someone better than Clint Eastwood to play the main character. Honestly, I think that is why I like the movie so much. He is not some super handsome perfect guy. He is normal and not perfect. He is also a great actor. The pain and anguish he feels makes me feel it right along with him. And the music is so beautiful! There are movies where the music almost makes the movie. High Road to China with Tom Selleck is one of those movies. It is good and he definitely makes the movie worth watching, but the music is amazing!
I just went back and read over this post...I think I have a touch of ADD...wow, it is all over the place. Anyway, here is hoping the New Year brings prosperity and happiness to us all! Wouldn't it be great to have just one year where no one had to worry about finances, loss, sickness or sadness?
This year, as in almost every year, I had to work. Kind of takes the fun out of Christmas. I love my job and I love the people I work with, but I would much rather be at home for sure. I also started feeling pretty crappy on Christmas day. I was struggling with my voice and I have been coughing for days. Considering all I do at work is talk, it makes it difficult to do my job. Then after work, my mom, my kids and I did the present thing. My kids ripped thru their gifts in about 3 minutes flat. My mom has had some kind of stomach bug for a few days so she wasn't feeling well and I was starting to get a fever with whatever bug I had. Yippee...super exciting Christmas.
I ended up in bed all day yesterday. I don't think I have slept so much as I did yesterday. Weird how fever does that to you. I drank and drank and it just didn't seem like enough. I didn't eat much either. I stayed home again today and when I woke up I was actually starving and my voice is somewhat back. I don't have a fever at the moment so that is a good thing. I am really hoping to be over this soon. I have a hard time being down in bed unless it is by my choice. Trust me, since my husband died, there have been many a day where I have done nothing but lay in bed, but that was my choice.
I did accomplish one thing yesterday. I paid for my school. I can't believe it is almost time to start school. I never thought it would get here, but at the same time it came so fast. Am I ready? I sure hope so.
I also watched a movie I got for Christmas yesterday. Bridges of Madison County. I just love that movie. I love the music and I love the tragic love story. I cried and cried over that movie. I have a friend that doesn't like it because she thinks they could have chosen someone better than Clint Eastwood to play the main character. Honestly, I think that is why I like the movie so much. He is not some super handsome perfect guy. He is normal and not perfect. He is also a great actor. The pain and anguish he feels makes me feel it right along with him. And the music is so beautiful! There are movies where the music almost makes the movie. High Road to China with Tom Selleck is one of those movies. It is good and he definitely makes the movie worth watching, but the music is amazing!
I just went back and read over this post...I think I have a touch of ADD...wow, it is all over the place. Anyway, here is hoping the New Year brings prosperity and happiness to us all! Wouldn't it be great to have just one year where no one had to worry about finances, loss, sickness or sadness?
Friday, December 20, 2013
What is Happening?
I have a confession to make. I have never seen Duck Dynasty. Not 1episode or even part of an episode. I have read interviews and they seem to be decent people. I'm impressed with the fact they share their beliefs no matter what. I believe that is part of the draw to the show. In a messed up world where values seem to be nonexistence, people have found something on tv that is decent to watch and they can relate to. Or maybe they just like the hillbilly look. Who knows. Without seeing the show I'm not sure.
Here is what I do know. I am a conservative Christian woman. I am not perfect and I have made some big mistakes so I am not in a position to judge anyone. I am not a racist or intolerant like some liberals say all conservatives are. I believe whole heartedly in the United States Constitution. I believe it was divinely inspired and this country was founded on those beliefs. I am also a mom who is worried about the world my kids are growing up in.
I am wondering when it became ok for a young woman to strut around a stage in her underwear, grind her body on a married man with children in front of millions of people and call her confused and trying to find herself. Yet it is not ok for a man who has already found himself and he expressed his religious beliefs and opinions and got suspended from the show because someone was offended. When did the rights of someone who is not a citizen of this country become more important than the rights of someone who fights to protect this country or legal citizens because we don't want to offend anyone? When did it become a bad thing to say Merry Christmas because someone could be offended? When did it become bad to pray in public because it might be offensive no matter what the religion? When did what celebrities think become more important than what anyone else thinks? When did we decide that it was ok for our government leaders to lie to us and not face the consequences? When did it become ok to violate a United States citizen's constitutional rights no matter what their religious beliefs, color their of their skin, gender or sexual orientation? Why is it all of these people are up in arms about a man from a tv show and yet they do nothing when our government lies over and over again? Why aren't we doing something about that? Why aren't we boycotting tv shows and magazines that promote nudity, violence and drugs?
How am I supposed to teach my kids to be honest if our leaders are not honest? How do I teach my daughter to dress appropriately when all she sees is girls and women showing a lot of skin and how do I teach my son to respect girls and women when they don't respect themselves? How do I teach my kids that everyone's opinion has value even when it isn't the same as yours and to stand up for what you believe is right when people are getting fired for sharing their opinions and standing up for what they believe in?
Our constitution affords us the right to speak our minds, to worship as we choose, to own guns if we want to and to vote how we want. Laws are put in place to protect us not to suppress us. We should be fighting for the constitution and our country. We should be demanding more from our leaders and when we aren't getting it, we should let them know at the voting polls.
I love this country and it is sad, disappointing and down right scary the way we are headed. I hope we wake up before it is too late...or is it already too late?
Here is what I do know. I am a conservative Christian woman. I am not perfect and I have made some big mistakes so I am not in a position to judge anyone. I am not a racist or intolerant like some liberals say all conservatives are. I believe whole heartedly in the United States Constitution. I believe it was divinely inspired and this country was founded on those beliefs. I am also a mom who is worried about the world my kids are growing up in.
I am wondering when it became ok for a young woman to strut around a stage in her underwear, grind her body on a married man with children in front of millions of people and call her confused and trying to find herself. Yet it is not ok for a man who has already found himself and he expressed his religious beliefs and opinions and got suspended from the show because someone was offended. When did the rights of someone who is not a citizen of this country become more important than the rights of someone who fights to protect this country or legal citizens because we don't want to offend anyone? When did it become a bad thing to say Merry Christmas because someone could be offended? When did it become bad to pray in public because it might be offensive no matter what the religion? When did what celebrities think become more important than what anyone else thinks? When did we decide that it was ok for our government leaders to lie to us and not face the consequences? When did it become ok to violate a United States citizen's constitutional rights no matter what their religious beliefs, color their of their skin, gender or sexual orientation? Why is it all of these people are up in arms about a man from a tv show and yet they do nothing when our government lies over and over again? Why aren't we doing something about that? Why aren't we boycotting tv shows and magazines that promote nudity, violence and drugs?
How am I supposed to teach my kids to be honest if our leaders are not honest? How do I teach my daughter to dress appropriately when all she sees is girls and women showing a lot of skin and how do I teach my son to respect girls and women when they don't respect themselves? How do I teach my kids that everyone's opinion has value even when it isn't the same as yours and to stand up for what you believe is right when people are getting fired for sharing their opinions and standing up for what they believe in?
Our constitution affords us the right to speak our minds, to worship as we choose, to own guns if we want to and to vote how we want. Laws are put in place to protect us not to suppress us. We should be fighting for the constitution and our country. We should be demanding more from our leaders and when we aren't getting it, we should let them know at the voting polls.
I love this country and it is sad, disappointing and down right scary the way we are headed. I hope we wake up before it is too late...or is it already too late?
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