Does Anyone Really Talk Anymore?

Is it just me, or am I the only one that thinks people don't talk enough anymore? We are in an age where there is email, instant message, texting, facebook, twitter and myspace. We can even get our dates on the internet. We all seem to spend a lot of time on our phones and computers but nobody is doing any talking. I admit it, I'm just as guilty of this. I'm not able to talk on the phone at work so I do a lot of texting. At home I love to get on facebook and comment on what people are writing either on their own wall or mine. I guess the reason I am wondering is, there is this guy that I have been kind of seeing off and on over the last year. When we go out we have fun. He once asked me though if I was his girlfriend. I had to tell him no, we are just friends at this point and we are not exclusive because of that. Why? Because we never talk on the phone. Everything we do is electronic. I've mentioned it several times to him, he will call once and then it is right back to electronic. I do the typical girl thing trying to rationalize and justify it. "Maybe he doesn't like to talk on the phone." "Maybe that is how it's supposed to be now days." These are all just rationalizations. I don't like to talk on the phone that much either because that is what I do for a living, but there comes a time in any relationship where you need to talk. You need that communication that makes it personal. A person can lie to your face for sure, but it is a lot harder. When you really talk to a person, you learn their mannerisms, their tics, their voice. When it's on text, you don't get any of that so they can say whatever damn thing they wanna say and it can be taken the wrong way. That can be really embarrassing! Yep, we definitely need to be talking more!

Dating

Dating is a challenge for anyone for sure. Men, women...doesn't matter. If you add children into the mix it adds a whole new dimension to it. You have to worry about them and their feelings, babysitting, do you introduce your kids? It goes on and on. Plus, they have opinions too and they are NOT afraid to share them! After my husband had been gone for about a year and a half my kids and I were in the car. Out of the blue my son says, "Mom, when are you going to get us a new daddy?". That shocked me to say the least. We had a conversation about it. I said all the right things, "I have to be careful", "I can't just pick anyone. He has to be special". You get the idea. I thought the conversation was over until the next day. We went to Walmart and were standing in line. The lines were long and slow. There were a lot of people around too. I'm standing there talking to my kids and out of the blue my son yells (because he never talks quietly), "Mommy! We can't leave yet! You didn't buy us a new daddy!!". Everyone around us started cracking up and I couldn't believe my boy had just screamed this! I told him, "We can't buy a daddy at Walmart and we will talk about this later." :) Shortly after that I decided it was time to stick my toes in the dating pool. Not to find a daddy for my kids or a husband for me, but to start moving forward with my life.

I met a really great guy at work. I will call him Mr. Smiley. He is a very handsome man that has an amazing smile and loved to show it off. :) He would come in to the section where I worked all the time, but I was so out of the game I had no idea he was coming in there for me. Finally he asked me out. I was so nervous. It was my first date in over 8 years! He came to the house to pick me up. Talk about awkward. My kids were there and my mom was there to babysit. The first thing my son said was, "Wanna come see my room?!". LOL Mr. Smiley was very nice and told him no. After that I decided my dates will not come to my house anymore...we will just have to meet somewhere! It was a very nice date, I liked him, he liked me, we got along and he was handsome. The problem, it was my first date back and I was terrified. I was scared to death of having it go anywhere serious even though he was the perfect man for that step. Timing is everything! I didn't have the decency to tell him what was wrong, I just avoided him. I hurt him bad and I regret that to this day. We have started talking again since then and I have apologized. I just hope he can really forgive me. I have learned a lot over the last few years since then and I still have a lot more to learn. 'Til next time!

Howdy

I like to say howdy a lot instead of the typical hello or hi. I'm from a small ranching community and I guess it is part of the smalltown girl in me. I have decided to start a new blog. Who knew how hard it would be to do that. I have a personal family blog that I have blogging on for a few years now so I didn't think it would be that big of a deal. This one is different though. I have several friends that have mentioned to me several times that I need to write a book about my dating adventures or misadventures. Apparently my dating life is entertaining! haha! I have given it a lot of thought and have decided to do a blog instead. I'm still a single mom so it is ongoing and forever changing. Plus, I don't know anything about writing a book! Being a single mom is all encompassing. Raising children on my own, lonliness, humor, frustration, dating, doing it all. This blog is public where my personal one is private. It is not going to be totally about my kids, although there may be a few things about them since the whole MOM thing wouldn't have happened without them. It is about me and my personal journey we call life. I want single parents to read my blog and say, "Oh my gosh, that has so happened to me!" or "Wait until you hear my story!". I want people to come here, read and comment. Share your stories or advice. The life of a single parent is unique for sure, but there a lot of single mom's and dad's out there. I guess we could call this blog group therapy! I am hoping this can be a place for honesty and venting while trying to do it with humor.

So, I guess I will take this opportunity in this first post to tell you about me. I am obviously a single mom. 5 1/2 years ago my husband passed away unexpectedly. Even though I was a sudden widow, had he not died, I would still be a single mom. We had spent several months seperated. During that seperation, we tried several times to reconcile, but it just wasn't working. His death has definitely affected the way I live and the way I am with men. I have two beautiful, smart and ornery children! They were very small when their dad died an they are now reaching an age where puberty is going to be knocking on our door in the next couple of years...oh joy!! My son has ADHD so that adds to the whole parenting experience and my daughter is very emotional...I am in so much trouble! I work fulltime. Although I love my job and I have been doing it for many years, it is a job. It pays the bills. I learned the hard way a long time ago that it does not define who I am...I do. I love music, movies, reading and taking pictures. I love to blog, play on facebook, go for walks, hang with my family and friends, and I have certain tv shows I HAVE to watch every week. Ok, that's enough for now. You will get to know me soon enough!