Men and Women

Have the rolls of men and women in the dating game changed? About a year ago I read part of the book "He's Just Not That Into You". Pretty good book. Funny and informative. I really liked the movie too. When the movie came out, a couple of my girlfriends and I went and saw it and the whole time we all said several times, "I've done that!". I also read another book that basically talked about the same thing...let the man come to you. If he really is interested, he will. I'm really curious about this. I have a few men friends that say they like it when the women make the first move. They say it shows courage and strength if the woman does this. I'm wondering if they really do like this because it's an ego boost, is it easier for them so they don't have to make the first move?

Every year a girlfriend of mine and I celebrate our birthdays together. We have done this for the last several years. We have a lot of the same friends, our birthdays are close to each other and we are the same age so we just celebrate together. Last year we had a party and I invited this one man that I invite every year. He and I have been friends for a long time. I've always been somewhat attracted to him, but we were friends so I just let it be. A few years ago I was told he was interested in me for more than friendship, but he never did anything about it and then he got engaged to someone else so I just put that aside and continued with the friendship. The night of our birthday party he told me he has liked me for the last 3 years and he really wanted to talk to me about it. What???!!!! 3 years???!!!!! He's engaged to someone else and now he's telling me this 3 years later??!!! I went on a lunch date with him to talk about it. I asked him what he planned on doing if I said I was interested back and he said "nothing". He said it wasn't cold feet, he just needed to tell me before he got married. Now, I ask, what in the world is the purpose of that??? He didn't do anything about it when we were both available and maybe could have had something, he waits until a month before he gets married. After talking to some other single women out there, he's not the only one who has done this. There are several women out there who have had similar experiences. I'm just wondering if the art of wooing is gone. Should I be making the first move? If so I'm in trouble because I'm a believer that the man should be stepping up, being a man and taking care of it.