In church today, one of the lessons was called "Love Her Mother". It was basically about telling a father that the best thing he could do for his daughter, was to love her mother. Then they turned it around and said that the best thing a woman can do for her daughter is to "Love Her Father". That then started quite a discussion about the difference between men and women.
All of the women said they treated their husbands like they should read their minds. The woman says to herself, "I really would like to stop and get ice cream." Well, he's not going to know unless she actually says it...he can't read minds! They then said they would like their man to just do it without prompting.
That got me giggling inside. I am certainly not an expert about men. I haven't been married for over 7 years and my dating life leaves something to be desired. I couldn't really participate in the discussion without feeling like a know it all. However, I do work with a lot of men and the majority of my friends are men. So, ladies, here are a couple things having men friends has taught me. Men have to fix things. It is completely natural and automatic to them. Here is an example. I was talking to Bud a few weeks ago. I was telling him about a little problem I was having with my love life. I didn't give him any names or specific details, I was just giving enough information that he would understand me. Well, he then proceeded to give me ideas on what I could do and they were pretty outrageous! I could tell he was grasping at straws. Finally I told him that I didn't need him to fix it, I just was venting. He then said, "Good! Cuz I got nothing." Haha
Men are straightforward creatures. They just want you to say it in as few words as possible because that is what they do. This is one thing I love about having men friends. Bud just tells me what he's thinking whether I want him to or not. Ha! I know that I can also say whatever I am thinking. He never, ever knocks me for saying it. We may bicker like we've been married for 10 years as my sister put it, but he never gives me a hard time about saying what I'm thinking. The other day I told one of my other guy friends that if I'm ever a mean bitch to please just tell me! I would rather him say it to me than to just think it and be mad at me. He was quick to promise he would. :)
Now it would only be fair if I said a few things about women...for those few men that actually read my blog. I don't even think Bud reads my blog...he would tell me he is much to busy to read it and why does anyone care anyway? lol
Guys, women make up these big stories in their minds about how they think things are or should be. These stories could be romantic fantasy or they could be fear about something. 99% of these stories NEVER turn out to be the way we think of them, but we can't help it!
We expect men to read our minds. When they ask us what's wrong and we say nothing, we expect them to know that it isn't "nothing" and they better figure out what is wrong. Why we don't just say what's wrong, I have no idea. It's just how it is.
We also like to tell long stories. We have to give every single detail so you can picture it right along with us. We want you to understand it and feel it just like you were there!
The last thing I will tell you guys is this, women LOVE little gestures and big gestures. We love it when you do it on your own without being told or hints being dropped...not that you get hints anyway! :) We love flowers just because once in a while. We love a text message or a phone call just to say hi. A friend of mine texted me the other day because there was a big wreck on my way home and he wanted to make sure I made it through the wreck. That meant a lot to me! He probably has no idea why that means a lot to me.
We will never fully understand the differences. We will continue to annoy and drive each other crazy. We will scratch our heads and wonder what in the world is going on with them. We will sometimes have to "fake it 'til we make it" as someone said today, but it is worth it. How boring life would be if men and women were the same!
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Rumor Has It
Do you remember that game called telephone? Someone tells someone a story, then they tell the story to someone else, but change it slightly or add something to it. By the time it's done the story is completely different. The game is to teach kids about rumors and gossip. We have all been victims of gossip and rumors and we have all at one time purpetuated it. It is human nature. We hear a juicy tidbit of information and just have to share it with someone.
Last night I was watching one of my favorite movies...Steel Magnolias. Aside from making me bawl like a baby even after the 100th time of watching it, it also is the perfect example of gossip. A bunch of women get together in a beauty shop and gossip about the locals. It got me to thinking about how natural this is for people to do this, but it can be harmful and hurtful too.
Over the last few years I have heard quite a bit of gossip. I have also learned that 95% of it is not true. Some of it was about friends. I actually went to one of my friends and told him what rumor I heard. He was really upset and offended. He then clarified it for me. After clarifying several rumors this way, I realized that most rumors are untrue and I need to be careful what I believe and what I repeat.
I have also learned that if there is something about my life that I want to keep private, don't share it with ANYONE! As you can tell, I'm pretty open about my life. I have a blog for goodness sake, but there are somethings that I won't share...no matter what. Stories get twisted around and misunderstandings happen.
A good example of a rumor is, my kids came home and told me about a neighborhood kid that had gone missing the day before. They both said he was still missing. I was very upset by this. I decided to check out the validity of the rumor, so I called the aunt of the child. I figured if the rumor was untrue, they should know about it and if it was true, then I could offer my time and whatever else they needed. She said he in fact had gone missing the day before, but thankfully he was found right away and he was just fine! What a big relief! My kids and I had to have a talk about spreading rumors and they need to make sure what they are saying is the truth.
I just want to say, that if any of you hear a rumor about me, please tell me. If it makes me sound exciting I just might say it's true!
Last night I was watching one of my favorite movies...Steel Magnolias. Aside from making me bawl like a baby even after the 100th time of watching it, it also is the perfect example of gossip. A bunch of women get together in a beauty shop and gossip about the locals. It got me to thinking about how natural this is for people to do this, but it can be harmful and hurtful too.
Over the last few years I have heard quite a bit of gossip. I have also learned that 95% of it is not true. Some of it was about friends. I actually went to one of my friends and told him what rumor I heard. He was really upset and offended. He then clarified it for me. After clarifying several rumors this way, I realized that most rumors are untrue and I need to be careful what I believe and what I repeat.
I have also learned that if there is something about my life that I want to keep private, don't share it with ANYONE! As you can tell, I'm pretty open about my life. I have a blog for goodness sake, but there are somethings that I won't share...no matter what. Stories get twisted around and misunderstandings happen.
A good example of a rumor is, my kids came home and told me about a neighborhood kid that had gone missing the day before. They both said he was still missing. I was very upset by this. I decided to check out the validity of the rumor, so I called the aunt of the child. I figured if the rumor was untrue, they should know about it and if it was true, then I could offer my time and whatever else they needed. She said he in fact had gone missing the day before, but thankfully he was found right away and he was just fine! What a big relief! My kids and I had to have a talk about spreading rumors and they need to make sure what they are saying is the truth.
I just want to say, that if any of you hear a rumor about me, please tell me. If it makes me sound exciting I just might say it's true!
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Rejuvenation
I love the rain! With winter rain it is a little chilly or cold and the clouds are gray, flat and heavy with rain. I love the way the rain comes down...more than a drizzle and less than a down pour. It is a nice steady rain with no wind. That is the kind of rain this dry desert needs. The kind that soaks into the ground instead of running off.
Summer monsoon rains are exciting! The thunder clouds build and build. They build so high they look like they are touching space. Then they get so heavy with rain they just collapse. The lightening pops across the sky and the thunder rolls. you can watch the storm move in and the air is alive with the anticipation of a down pour. When I was a kid living up in the mountains, this was an everyday occurance from July to September. Sometimes it was around 1 in the afternoon and other times it was later, but it was every day. As a kid my sister and I would stand at the window and hope that it would be later in the day so we could go swimming at the local pool!
The rain doesn't seem to come nearly as often anymore. I'm not sure if I believe the whole global warming thing, but I do believe that weather patterns change and it has definitely changed. We still get the summer monsoon rains, but in this dry, hot desert they don't come as often. I think the city holds the heat like a big dome that forces the rain around us. The one thing I don't like about living in the desert is the lack of rain.
In my life I have been blessed to live in the mountains of this beautiful state and also in the desert. The rain storms are always welcome no matter where in the state they fall. The rain washes away the dust and sadness of many, many weeks of no rain. The air is clean, everything is greener. The earth greedily sucks up the moisture because it has been starved of it for so long.
I find myself feeling that way too. I get cranky and grouchy when we don't have rain. I get tired of the pollution, dust, dirt and dryness...and not just physically, but mentally as well. The rain washes away the sadness I feel and automatically makes me happy. I am happy knowing that God is still blessing us and this earth with the moisture that is so desperately needed.
After knowing all this about me, imagine my excitement when I woke this morning to rain hitting my bedroom window! I couldn't believe it was real! They had been forcasting it for a week, but I have learned to not get excited because I usually get disappointed. Not today! I jumped out of bed and got my kids moving. It was time for a bike ride in the rain. We all bundled up and headed out. Oh how glorious it was! My kids liked it at first, then they got hungry and wet and wanted to go home. I rode home with them and then headed out on my own. Usually I take my music when I ride, but today I didn't. I just rode in silence listening to the hum of my tires on wet cement. Even though it was raining, the birds were singing their excitement about the rain too! It was the most beautiful morning! I feel like the rain has washed away the dust from my soul and like this dry desert, I am rejuvenated!
Summer monsoon rains are exciting! The thunder clouds build and build. They build so high they look like they are touching space. Then they get so heavy with rain they just collapse. The lightening pops across the sky and the thunder rolls. you can watch the storm move in and the air is alive with the anticipation of a down pour. When I was a kid living up in the mountains, this was an everyday occurance from July to September. Sometimes it was around 1 in the afternoon and other times it was later, but it was every day. As a kid my sister and I would stand at the window and hope that it would be later in the day so we could go swimming at the local pool!
The rain doesn't seem to come nearly as often anymore. I'm not sure if I believe the whole global warming thing, but I do believe that weather patterns change and it has definitely changed. We still get the summer monsoon rains, but in this dry, hot desert they don't come as often. I think the city holds the heat like a big dome that forces the rain around us. The one thing I don't like about living in the desert is the lack of rain.
In my life I have been blessed to live in the mountains of this beautiful state and also in the desert. The rain storms are always welcome no matter where in the state they fall. The rain washes away the dust and sadness of many, many weeks of no rain. The air is clean, everything is greener. The earth greedily sucks up the moisture because it has been starved of it for so long.
I find myself feeling that way too. I get cranky and grouchy when we don't have rain. I get tired of the pollution, dust, dirt and dryness...and not just physically, but mentally as well. The rain washes away the sadness I feel and automatically makes me happy. I am happy knowing that God is still blessing us and this earth with the moisture that is so desperately needed.
After knowing all this about me, imagine my excitement when I woke this morning to rain hitting my bedroom window! I couldn't believe it was real! They had been forcasting it for a week, but I have learned to not get excited because I usually get disappointed. Not today! I jumped out of bed and got my kids moving. It was time for a bike ride in the rain. We all bundled up and headed out. Oh how glorious it was! My kids liked it at first, then they got hungry and wet and wanted to go home. I rode home with them and then headed out on my own. Usually I take my music when I ride, but today I didn't. I just rode in silence listening to the hum of my tires on wet cement. Even though it was raining, the birds were singing their excitement about the rain too! It was the most beautiful morning! I feel like the rain has washed away the dust from my soul and like this dry desert, I am rejuvenated!
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Working Out
At the beginning of the year, I made a goal to workout more. I wanted to get into a good rhythm with it so when the hot weather hits, I will be in a good routine and will be able to somehow carry on thru the summer. So far, so good.
I am amazed at how I am getting stronger all the time. I have been able to increase my cardio and really workout hard. I have a friend that I am accountable to and he is accountable to me. I am walking, riding my bike and doing circuit training and I am having so much fun with it!
The only frustrating part is, I am not seeing a difference in my appearance or the way my clothes fit. My mom, sister and kids all tell me they can see the difference, mostly from the back and that's why I can't see it. Well, dammit, my clothes need to start getting looser and then I will start to really feel like I am making progress! I am making progress in my cardiovascular strength for sure and I am able to do a lot more of the exercises, but I would really like to start seeing a change to keep me going. I refuse to get on the scale. That would make me so depressed! My friend says he can't see the difference in his workouts either, but his family says they can see it.
So, I guess I will keep plugging along and hopefully it will kick in!
No TV
A few weeks ago I was talking to my sister and she told me they got rid of tv. They have said they were going to do this several times, but she always changes her mind. Well, my brother-in-law cancelled the cable while my sister was a work before she could change her mind again. haha
They inspired me. I was thinking, we only watch a few channels and I am paying $70 a month for those few channels. My kids are vegging out instead of playing outside or getting their homework done. So, I followed my sister's example and got rid of tv. That was a huge deal for me. I am a tv junky. I think it is harder on me than it is on my kids! When I first said I was going to do it, I held a family meeting in the car where they had no where to go and explained why I am getting rid of tv...money being the biggest reason. They seemed to be okay with it. By that afternoon they were saying they were bored! lol
I finally got the dvd player in the living room working so I can watch movies in there. My kids have started watching movies in their room too, but they are also reading more and playing more games. I also have been watching some stuff on Netflix. It is kind of hard because it's on my phone that I have to watch it and there are only so many things available on the phone version aside from the small screen. I did watch 52 episodes of Mad Men and 51 episodes of Flashpoint. Both are very good shows by the way! When I said something to my friend about getting rid of tv all he said was, "Your poor kids." haha
I bought one of those digital antennas. Seems pretty simple. You hook it in like you would cable. Easy, right??? Well, of course it's not working! Ugh...I get so annoyed with high tech stuff.
I'm at my mom's as I write this post and I am finding myself getting distracted by the tv. Maybe I will take advantage of that as well and go watch it.
Silly Kids!
I posted about this on facebook a few weeks ago, but the story is too good not to share! As I have shared before, my kids are always on the lookout for a husband for me. It's kind of scary actually. I love my children so much, but their choices? All I can say is wow! I'm a lot more picky than they are!
So, my daughter was going to spend the night at a friend's house a few weeks ago. As we were walking out the door she said, "Oh, I should tell you Mom. My friend has 2 dads." Ok, now she will be exposed to a different way of life. Having 2 dads is not the norm! I was so glad my daughter was so good with it, she almost forgot about it! Anyway, I dropped her off and went in to meet the parents. I met one of the dads and all 4 of the kids. What a great family! She originally was only going to stay a couple hours, but she called me and asked if she could spend the night. I took her clothes over to her and the dad that I had met earlier asked me to stay and eat. I said no, but he is like a mexican mama and insisted that I eat dinner with them and would not take no for an answer. We were all sitting on the back patio and I hear my daughter whisper to her friend, "My mom is single." Oh no. "Is your dad single?" Her friend says, "I already told you about my parents!!!" So, my daughter was trying to set me up with a gay man that is in a committed relationship! Wow...so I have had my son at the age of 6 scream in Walmart that we can't leave because I didn't buy a husband yet, my son think that every guy that is alone in a pick up on the freeway is a potential husband for me and now my daughter try to set me up with a gay man. They are definitely not allowed to be my matchmakers!!
So, my daughter was going to spend the night at a friend's house a few weeks ago. As we were walking out the door she said, "Oh, I should tell you Mom. My friend has 2 dads." Ok, now she will be exposed to a different way of life. Having 2 dads is not the norm! I was so glad my daughter was so good with it, she almost forgot about it! Anyway, I dropped her off and went in to meet the parents. I met one of the dads and all 4 of the kids. What a great family! She originally was only going to stay a couple hours, but she called me and asked if she could spend the night. I took her clothes over to her and the dad that I had met earlier asked me to stay and eat. I said no, but he is like a mexican mama and insisted that I eat dinner with them and would not take no for an answer. We were all sitting on the back patio and I hear my daughter whisper to her friend, "My mom is single." Oh no. "Is your dad single?" Her friend says, "I already told you about my parents!!!" So, my daughter was trying to set me up with a gay man that is in a committed relationship! Wow...so I have had my son at the age of 6 scream in Walmart that we can't leave because I didn't buy a husband yet, my son think that every guy that is alone in a pick up on the freeway is a potential husband for me and now my daughter try to set me up with a gay man. They are definitely not allowed to be my matchmakers!!
Long Time no Talk!
Wow, it feels like it has been years since I have posted!!! You have no idea how much I miss blogging. As you can guess, I still don't have internet on my computer. I could post from my phone, but it would be like texting a novel and I don't have the patience for that. A friend of mine said she got her computer fixed at Staples for $10, but sometimes even $10 is a lot. So, still waiting for that financial windfall my horoscope promised me last year!
My mom moved in January and she now finally has internet. She was having issues getting it hooked up. But, she has internet now and she lives 10 minutes closer to me so hopefully I can get some posts done!
Last night my daughter had a friend stay the night. Now let me say, I think I might be a mean mom. When my daughter goes to her friends' houses to spend the night, they stay up until 2 am, eat whatever they want and do pretty much whatever they want. Well, around 1100 I was getting after them and telling them it was time to go to bed. I don't think they went to sleep until after midnight. I also didn't let them eat whatever they wanted and I insisted that rules were followed. I will be a mean mom anyday!
Today both of my kids have gone quading with a friends. That makes me so nervous! I know I have to let my kids grow up and go do things even though I am not comfortable with some of those things. If I kept them home everytime I was uncomfortable, my poor kids would never leave the house! So, I resorted to fear tactics and told them kids die on quads all the time because rules were not followed. They better wear helmets and follow rules and be safe. Now I have to let them go and hope they listened. I think that is one of the hardest parts about being a parent, letting our kids venture out into the world, do dangerous things and pray they have been listening to our paranoia...or maybe I'm the only mom that is paranoid. I think my job makes me that way. My late husband used to get really iritated with me. One time my stepdaughter was about 12 years old, the same age as my son is now. She wanted to go with her aunt, uncle and cousins to go quading. There were rules that I set down with her and them. She was to wear a helmet and she was not to drive. I got agreements from everyone and promises that these rules would be followed. A couple hours later we got a call, my stepdaughter was being taken to the emergency room because she crashed on the quad. She was not wearing a helmet and she was driving and ran into a tree. Luckily, all she needed was a few stitches, but to say the least I was furious. The family couldn't understand why I was so mad! Anyway, sometimes my paranoia is justified! Ha!
My mom moved in January and she now finally has internet. She was having issues getting it hooked up. But, she has internet now and she lives 10 minutes closer to me so hopefully I can get some posts done!
Last night my daughter had a friend stay the night. Now let me say, I think I might be a mean mom. When my daughter goes to her friends' houses to spend the night, they stay up until 2 am, eat whatever they want and do pretty much whatever they want. Well, around 1100 I was getting after them and telling them it was time to go to bed. I don't think they went to sleep until after midnight. I also didn't let them eat whatever they wanted and I insisted that rules were followed. I will be a mean mom anyday!
Today both of my kids have gone quading with a friends. That makes me so nervous! I know I have to let my kids grow up and go do things even though I am not comfortable with some of those things. If I kept them home everytime I was uncomfortable, my poor kids would never leave the house! So, I resorted to fear tactics and told them kids die on quads all the time because rules were not followed. They better wear helmets and follow rules and be safe. Now I have to let them go and hope they listened. I think that is one of the hardest parts about being a parent, letting our kids venture out into the world, do dangerous things and pray they have been listening to our paranoia...or maybe I'm the only mom that is paranoid. I think my job makes me that way. My late husband used to get really iritated with me. One time my stepdaughter was about 12 years old, the same age as my son is now. She wanted to go with her aunt, uncle and cousins to go quading. There were rules that I set down with her and them. She was to wear a helmet and she was not to drive. I got agreements from everyone and promises that these rules would be followed. A couple hours later we got a call, my stepdaughter was being taken to the emergency room because she crashed on the quad. She was not wearing a helmet and she was driving and ran into a tree. Luckily, all she needed was a few stitches, but to say the least I was furious. The family couldn't understand why I was so mad! Anyway, sometimes my paranoia is justified! Ha!
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